I write this article not in defence of sharks, or even to attack them, but in the vain hope that any sort of TV controller will put a stop the mad, bad, and frankly frustrating tendency of all nature documentary film makers to produce films that 'dispel with the myth that sharks are mindless killing machines, but actually wonders of nature, refined and intelligent'.
Basil Fawlty once demanded an award for stating the bleedin' obvious, and I demand it awarded here. I cannot believe that there is a single person in the World that is still under the impression that Sharks are nasty bastards, if only because the media insists on the contrary every time they pop up.
JAWS came out in the SEVENTIES! Stop telling me how nice sharks are! I already know! National Geographic have a show on the subject once a day, BBC once a month, and channel five about once every twenty seconds. Last I saw even him off men behaving badly was in on the act.
The only logical explanation that I can come up with is that a million new kids are born every day that need educating on sharks. If this is true of course, maybe my rant is directed at the wrong person. Perhaps an open letter to Stevey Spielberg is more appropriate.
Dear Steven,
Congratulations on your efforts to bring about shark awareness worldwide.
I am writing to implore you to do two things for the good of humanity. Firstly, take yo head out yo arse and learn how to make a good film again.
Secondly, please make a genre defining, summer dominating blockbuster, like jaws, expect where the villain is... contraception. Then maybe TV will spend the next 40 years telling everyone how awesome it actually is, and I will have to spend less time learning about how nice sharks are.
Kind Regards,
Henry
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